x86Conspiracy™

(Borrowed from Jerkface, based on Happy MS is Doomed Day) This is an interesting one.

In olden “Wintel” days, the theory was that Microsoft had Intel “on side” (yes, I know this is ludicrous). According to this theory, the main aim of Intel was — not to sell hardware — but to sell Windows boxen.

This lasted right up to the point where Apple began building Macs on Intel chips.

The new theory is that Intel is just aching to ditch Microsoft at every opportunity, which means that there is an opening for Linux on the desktop. Well, actually, Intel is aiming more at massively parallel chips (but don’t worry: Linux runs supercomputers) and mobile devices (but don’t worry, there’s always, er, Nokia and Android). And let’s ignore the pesky fact that Intel has a huge cash-cow selling x86 boxen featuring Windows.

Even better, there’s an intermediate theory that suggests that Linux doesn’t even need Intel to succeed, because ARM processors (or perhaps it’s LEGO, or maybe SPLEEN) will take over the world. So Linux doesn’t need to run on z80s either … even though it could. Given enough support from the basement.

Essentially, this trademark represents a combination of total ignorance as to how hardware works, coupled with a total ignorance of how the market works.

It’s classic Linux wish-fulfilment.

(Pic from Something Foul in Silicon Valley, just in case anybody wants to follow up.)